Who’s struggling?

Claire W said:
I’m feeling so guilty 😞 Several years ago, I could hold down a full time job, run a house and take care of 15 pets. These days, dragging myself out of bed and doing one household job a day and taking care of 6 pets is an achievement 😞
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It's OK your achievements are achievements no matter how small. A few years ago my mental health was so bad I could only bring myself to get up and get dressed once or twice a week. You have to take each day as it comes. 6 pets is still more than most people could manage and one household task a day is still contributing to the household. Some days are tougher than others but beating yourself up about it only makes it harder. Take pride in what you used to do but take pride in the fact you're currently looking after 6 pets, contributing to the house, being a massive support for family members, and working through your own struggles. That's not nothing and I'm sure the people close to you can see that too.
 
It's my birthday on Thursday but a little girl I look after recently passed away and the funeral is the day before. I feel like such a let down because everyone wants to meet up, go out or do something for my birthday but I just don't feel like doing anything. I know it's part of the job but I've never lost a child I've worked with before let alone someone ive worked with this closely and had this much of a soft spot for. I don't feel like faking excitement for opening presents and meeting up with everyone when we've just lost such a bright little light. I've lost two family members and a colleague already this year and I'm not sure I can pretend it's all ok.
 
Sweet Potato said:
It's my birthday on Thursday but a little girl I look after recently passed away and the funeral is the day before. I feel like such a let down because everyone wants to meet up, go out or do something for my birthday but I just don't feel like doing anything. I know it's part of the job but I've never lost a child I've worked with before let alone someone ive worked with this closely and had this much of a soft spot for. I don't feel like faking excitement for opening presents and meeting up with everyone when we've just lost such a bright little light. I've lost two family members and a colleague already this year and I'm not sure I can pretend it's all ok.
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I am so sorry for all of your losses and it's ok to not feel like celebrating right now.

It is lovely you have people who want to celebrate your birthday with you, but it's also ok to say you would prefer to wait a few weeks or months until the time feels right for you.
I am sure people will understand.
 
Sweet Potato said:
It's my birthday on Thursday but a little girl I look after recently passed away and the funeral is the day before. I feel like such a let down because everyone wants to meet up, go out or do something for my birthday but I just don't feel like doing anything. I know it's part of the job but I've never lost a child I've worked with before let alone someone ive worked with this closely and had this much of a soft spot for. I don't feel like faking excitement for opening presents and meeting up with everyone when we've just lost such a bright little light. I've lost two family members and a colleague already this year and I'm not sure I can pretend it's all ok.
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Your feelings are completely valid and you can set whatever boundaries you need to in order to give yourself the care you need.
 
I’ve heard back from both TSB and Barclays and they’ve both confirmed they have closed the fraudulent bank accounts that were opened in my name and reported it to CIFA. I’ve been on the phone to Tesco mobile who have confirmed that there’s no account linked to my name or address so they must have closed it. My mum is also feeling a little better and thinks she’ll be ok again in another week or two. I hope that’s it now as I can’t cope with anymore stress
 
So today I've been advised by school not to go to the child's funeral tomorrow because of my history of mental illness. I'm not sure how to take it. I felt I needed the closure of going but at the same time I don't want people worrying about me and I don't want to take away from the service. I cry a lot anyway and I know there won't be a dry eye in the building tomorrow but I know as soon as I start crying people from work will start fussing over me and worrying that it's the start of a panic attack so I really don't think I can go.
 
Sweet Potato said:
So today I've been advised by school not to go to the child's funeral tomorrow because of my history of mental illness. I'm not sure how to take it. I felt I needed the closure of going but at the same time I don't want people worrying about me and I don't want to take away from the service. I cry a lot anyway and I know there won't be a dry eye in the building tomorrow but I know as soon as I start crying people from work will start fussing over me and worrying that it's the start of a panic attack so I really don't think I can.
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Could you just sit somewhere quiet and think of the child at the time of the funeral? It's an emotional time for all concerned.
 
Sweet Potato said:
So today I've been advised by school not to go to the child's funeral tomorrow because of my history of mental illness. I'm not sure how to take it. I felt I needed the closure of going but at the same time I don't want people worrying about me and I don't want to take away from the service. I cry a lot anyway and I know there won't be a dry eye in the building tomorrow but I know as soon as I start crying people from work will start fussing over me and worrying that it's the start of a panic attack so I really don't think I can go.
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I’m sorry that it’s been advised that you don’t attend the funeral tomorrow. How about lighting a candle for the the little girl and remembering her in your own way. Would that help bring closure? x
 
Claire W said:
I’m sorry that it’s been advised that you don’t attend the funeral tomorrow. How about lighting a candle for the the little girl and remembering her in your own way. Would that help bring closure? x
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I think there will be some sort of celebration of her life in school when the time is right and hopefully I will be able to attend that to get some sort of closure
 
My PIP form arrived yesterday 6 months early. It was sent on 4th March but I didn’t receive it until yesterday and only had two weeks to send it back (it should be 4). I filled it out and sealed the envelope only to realise there was something I forgot to write. It was a free post envelope but hub staid it would be ok to open it and put it in another A4 sized envelope and write the free post address on it. He took me to the post office and it was shut (says it’s open on a Saturday) but he was kind enough to drive me to another one. The post office guy said it would be sent for free as I’d written the free post address and code on the envelope but now I’m stressing out that it won’t be sent and of course that they’ll reject my claim. I feel so stressed out 😞
 
Claire W said:
My PIP form arrived yesterday 6 months early. It was sent on 4th March but I didn’t receive it until yesterday and only had two weeks to send it back (it should be 4). I filled it out and sealed the envelope only to realise there was something I forgot to write. It was a free post envelope but hub staid it would be ok to open it and put it in another A4 sized envelope and write the free post address on it. He took me to the post office and it was shut (says it’s open on a Saturday) but he was kind enough to drive me to another one. The post office guy said it would be sent for free as I’d written the free post address and code on the envelope but now I’m stressing out that it won’t be sent and of course that they’ll reject my claim. I feel so stressed out 😞
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Is this a new application Claire? If so then don't worry about the time limit, the time limit is to get it backdated to the day you called up for the form. It might just start from a later date but shouldn't cause it to be rejected. Best of luck with the application
 
Lady Kelly said:
Is this a new application Claire? If so then don't worry about the time limit, the time limit is to get it backdated to the day you called up for the form. It might just start from a later date but shouldn't cause it to be rejected. Best of luck with the application
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No, it’s a renewal. It wasn’t due until November so I wasn’t expecting the form until around September time so am rather stressed that it’s arrived early 😞 Thank you, I’m just so worried that they’ll either reject it or reduce the amount I receive as some of my evidence is from a while ago
 
Claire W said:
No, it’s a renewal. It wasn’t due until November so I wasn’t expecting the form until around September time so am rather stressed that it’s arrived early 😞 Thank you, I’m just so worried that they’ll either reject it or reduce the amount I receive as some of my evidence is from a while ago
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If your situation hasn't changed I think it's unlikely that they will change it. If they try to, well you can appeal and contact your medical professionals for more up to date evidence. There are always options Claire, please try not to stress
 
Lady Kelly said:
If your situation hasn't changed I think it's unlikely that they will change it. If they try to, well you can appeal and contact your medical professionals for more up to date evidence. There are always options Claire, please try not to stress
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Thank you. I have managed to get a recent medical summary from my GP but the rest of the care plans etc are from 2019-2021 as I was discharged from the MH team
 
I don't know why but I can't tie a knot today and it's really beginning to bug me. I have the thread cut. In fact I have two lots of the thread cut. The first, is properly knotted together, because I need the threads knotted together for storing them because trying to untangle bunches of threads later is impossible.
I can't get the second bunch to knot. Which means I can't cut more thread. Which means it's still going to sit there doing absolutely nothing and I'm going to have someone else asking me soon why my threads are just sitting around doing nothing because I can't tie a stupid knot.
 
Update - I don't know quite what triggered the panic attack earlier. It probably wasn't my inability to tie an overhand knot for some reason, but that won't have helped. I'm good now, and I've got a way around the overhand knot problem.
 
I am. So so badly. My whole herd have uri’s. I’ve been fighting bloat in one of my three for nearly 5 months. They’re all losing weight and becoming more lethargic. Meep is only 2, it’s just not her time to go. I’m a fully time uni student and deadlines are coming and I’ve barely even started. I’m so frightened I’m going to lose all three of my pigs. I’ve been to my vet so many times recently I’ve lost count. I’m so exhausted. All I do is sit at home crying in a horrible anxious ball.
 
piggy.pack said:
I am. So so badly. My whole herd have uti’s. I’ve been fighting bloat in one of my three for nearly 5 months. They’re all losing weight and becoming more lethargic. Meep is only 2, it’s just not her time to go. I’m a fully time uni student and deadlines are coming and I’ve barely even started. I’m so frightened I’m going to lose all three of my pigs. I’ve been to my vet so many times recently I’ve lost count. I’m so exhausted.
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I just want someone to talk to, someone to help me, I’m so down all the time and I just want to cuddle my piggies in my arms again and not feel their little bones protruding. I want to feel the joy of my favourite things in the entire world again.
 
piggy.pack said:
I am. So so badly. My whole herd have uti’s. I’ve been fighting bloat in one of my three for nearly 5 months. They’re all losing weight and becoming more lethargic. Meep is only 2, it’s just not her time to go. I’m a fully time uni student and deadlines are coming and I’ve barely even started. I’m so frightened I’m going to lose all three of my pigs. I’ve been to my vet so many times recently I’ve lost count. I’m so exhausted
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I’m so sorry I just read the top of the thread as non piggy related
 
Oh piggy.pack I’m so sorry to read about what’s going on for you - has your vet given you advice about feeding especially critical care food ?
We are all here to support you and listen - have you family that can help with the care of your piggies ?
You have done the right thing posting how you’re feeling
 
Hi @piggy.pack. I’m not surprised you are so stressed. One sick piggy is stressful enough let alone three of them AND essay deadlines too. Is there someone at your uni that you can talk to? You won’t be the first or the last who is struggling for whatever reasons as deadlines loom. Do you have a family member you can trust to look after them for you for a little while? That could take the pressure off you for a bit to focus on your course. You sound like a fantastic piggy slave.
 
Have you been to see your university for counselling? Most unis offer some sort of support for students struggling with their mental health. I know it feels like it's all about the piggies but it's uni stress too. You'd be amazed how many people don't cope with uni well especially when you have normal life ups and downs too. The media like to make out that further education is all parties and crazy opportunities but for a lot of people it's financial stress, anxiety and the shock of trying to live as an adult for the first time. You're doing the right thing with your piggies it's hard work but you just need to keep listening to your vet and keep going with treatment. This is any piggie owners worst nightmare but URIs can strike any herd at any time and it's nothing you've done wrong. You clearly care a lot about your pigs and I'm sure they feel that and appreciate your effort and love.
 
Sweet Potato said:
Have you been to see your university for counselling? Most unis offer some sort of support for students struggling with their mental health. I know it feels like it's all about the piggies but it's uni stress too. You'd be amazed how many people don't cope with uni well especially when you have normal life ups and downs too. The media like to make out that further education is all parties and crazy opportunities but for a lot of people it's financial stress, anxiety and the shock of trying to live as an adult for the first time. You're doing the right thing with your piggies it's hard work but you just need to keep listening to your vet and keep going with treatment. This is any piggie owners worst nightmare but URIs can strike any herd at any time and it's nothing you've done wrong. You clearly care a lot about your pigs and I'm sure they feel that and appreciate your effort and love.
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I think that will be a really good idea. They seem to have picked up rn :) My lovely boyfriend has offered to give me lots of help :) He’s a gem. I’ll be ringing up my vet whenever they’re open after easter and will just do my best :))
 
I do lots of talking with my team about stress and burnout and we talk a lot about emotional buckets. Your bucket fills with all the little life stresses and it’s fine, you can carry it. But then other stuff comes along and it starts to get harder to carry before it starts sloshing and overflowing. The only way to fix it is to slow down the flow of what is coming in (often difficult but not always impossible) or you find a way of making a hole so some can drain out. This is anything that relaxes you, exercise, friends, art etc or therapy. The more holes you can put in the better. Your bucket is really full just now so you might want to think about all the things that are contributing to that and see if there are any adjustments you could make. But also are you able to drain your bucket? Making time for that, even just ten minutes with a mindfulness app might just help tip things.

“I’ll be ok, I’ve just got a really full bucket just now” is a really common phrase at work and we all know to try and be kind and not contribute ourselves to the stresse!
 
We, as humans, can cope with a little stress at a time but if too many things pile up at once it quickly gets too much.

I struggle with anxiety, OCD and overthinking. This week I’ve been feeling overwhelmed. I’m worried about my mum (dementia) my dad (who’s feeling exhausted looking after my mum), my two sisters (ones got shingles really bad and the other is having a hard time with her health and a broken car), both my kids are buying houses and now I’ve found a lump in my boob. I’ve had counselling in the past so I am busy trying to empty my stress cup at the moment. It takes practice. I’m pleased the sun is shining. We all need to be mindful when things get too much. Sending everyone who is struggling a massive hug 🤗 x
 
I felt like a bit of an idiot when I brought a lump up with my GP - I was in my early 20s - but I got a referral to get it looked at. Turned out to be a hormonal lump, but it was worth it for the peace of mind.
 
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