The Goblin Diaries (previously Quitting Smoking)

I have found the answer, I think - they drank the bowl dry. They get fresh water twice daily (and more if required), I've never known them manage the whole thing before. They're not big drinkers.

I feel bad, and I should feel bad.
 
Sigh. At least I won't run out any time soon.

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It's absolutely chucking it outside too, was fine til half an hour ago. I said thank you to the driver and he ran off yelling. Running's perfectly appropriate in this weather but I don't know who he was yelling at, I think it was his phone? I hope he's not misheard me and got mad for it, lol. I need DPD on my side, y'know!
 
It’s good to see you put those boys first …..hay hay hay hay
Miss Bramble will be very impressed !
 
Last night I walked into the bedroom to find Cam, laying out under the carcass of a carrot cottage, eyes closed. Git, I nearly had a heart attack til he woke up and was like hi! Pea flakes? Please? Pea flakes!

I'm glad he's alive, but it's slightly bittersweet. It's the first time I've seen either goblin use the carcass of a carrot cottage for a hidey, but Comet and Blitzen would do it all the time and he might not look like Comet, but he could've easily been him last night.
 
So my head hurts, my vision is twitchy and I feel queasy. So why am I not doing the smart thing and taking a nap? Well, the sun's out and there's loads of sunlight in the goblin cage and they're absolutely loving it. How can I deny them that?

The things we do for them, right? So instead I bought the original Scooby Doo episodes on Prime and I'm wishing Asda didn't substitute my Coke for bottles that I've no room in the fridge for lol. Emergency Amazon run on Tuesday I should think. Tuesday's not a holiday in England right? It is in NI.
 
Poor you and you are right Tuesday is normal day
Hope you feel better soon 🥰
 
It's been Bann's Do Weird Things turn today. Imagine a rumbling boar who is also wheeking and chittering at the same time. It's an incredible noise that he's never made before and I can almost guarantee it'll never happen again :wub: I think he surprised himself actually, even Camowen stopped when it happened!
 
Bann left his bed for breakfast hay. Cam left his bed, rumble-walked to the hay pile, paused, started chittering, walked into Bann's bed and peed in the doorway.

Also I think they're sick of bell peppers :)) baby cucumbers and mint it is, then.
 
They'll be over it by Wednesday (...I hope, anyway lol). I blame Tesco for only having multipacks of their sweet bell peppers in stock because those things are enormous as peppers go. The Nightengale Farm ones are smaller.

I bought the massive Asda bag again and those are always smaller so when they're bored of cucumber in two days time I'm sorted!
 
One of the goblins, I think it's Bann, keeps making this single note shriek that sounds like the single note shriek the smoke alarm might make.

Now, assuming it is Bann, because he's always the one about when those noises happen, he does it when he walks into something, trips over something, stabs himself with a piece of hay...

Except now he knows that noise summons me so he does it when he thinks I haven't been paying him enough attention because when I come to go "wtf was that" he gets really excited that I'm there.

How is it they can both be so smart and both be so lacking in brains at the same time?
 
The goblins are due breakfast in 25 minutes.

I came downstairs to glue the puzzle.

I've glued it, taken out the recycling, done the washing up, taken the dry clothes off the clothes horse, and nothing else downstairs needs doing, and

The goblins aren't due breakfast for 25 minutes.

Oops.
 
Dear Bann and Cam

I understand that your Slave forgot to give you your breakfast this morning as he was too busy doing household chores. How very dare he! He may have had a bit of time to spare before your official breakfast time but there is nothing wrong with an early breakfast it there? We love it when we get an early breakfast. It means more time for doing other important piggy stuff.

I wouldn't let this go unpunished if I were you! I have looked at Booklet "What to do when your Slave forgets to give you breakfast" and Page 3, Paragraph 4, Subsection 1b states "Should your Slave ever have the audacity to forget to serve you your breakfast you should
  • Make it very clear that your Slave is late and that this behaviour will not be tolerated.
  • Wheak louder than usual at your Slave or give them the silent treatment (you know your Slave best and what will worry them the most)
  • Refuse to come out of your hideys whenever your Slave is around or go and hide in them whichever you feel is the best course of action.
  • Stand with your feet on a food bowl and look beseechingly at your Slave
  • If you have to play 'hunt your food' because your Slave doesn't use food bowls stand with your front legs on the bars of your cage and look cute."
Also it has been agreed that @fluffysal should hand over the Cup of Disgrace to your Slave.

I hope that following this advice will mean that your Slave never forgets to give you breakfast again.

Your helpful friend

Miss Bramble
Shop Steward
 
I'm going to make a human interjection here to complain I'm trying to work out which knots go where using a box image this size:

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Meanwhile I caught sight of Cam's ear the wrong way and thought he'd managed to tear it in half. As you can imagine, it was just very pink and hanging weirdly. Sigh. 🤷‍♂️
 
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