Yes he needed me and that’s why I saw him on my dream .. But now that I need him and Rati ,they can’t help me .. Everyday I’m trying to avoid my sadness and forget about it ,and I manage to do it ,but then it hits me again ,and it’s very bad ! It’s like I haven’t accept yet that they’re not alive , and trying to pretend like nothing happened ,and after a few moments their faces are crossing my mind ,and feel desperate because I want to see them again ,but i can’t .. I don’t like to say that ,because you still have piggies , but the most times I see an older piggy getting sick,the piggy is not recovering at all ,or is recovering much harder .. It’s very good that you start trying to eat more .. I think it would be a good idea to check the reviews of those drinks ,just to make sure that they’ve helped other people ,and you don’t spend your money without reason .. But my advice is to give a try to those drinks if you think that they will help you , just don’t skip your regular meals.. I don’t know the whole story with your bf and what he is been through ,probably he is having a really hard time too .. But Bipolar disorder and drinking? That sounds deadly! Drinking is a very bad issue on its own ,and if we already have other issues ,and we also drink alcohol, that is catastrophic, you see what happened to me,because of that ..Keep contact with him ,to see how he is doing and help him if he needed it ,but i don’t think it’s the right time for you to be together again , you already have your own problems and i think you need to focus more on yourself , and when you will feel better you will see if you’re ready to be again with your bf, and also if he is ready to be a better person without drinking ..But You know him better so you know what is best to do .. Yes I do came out stronger ,and I’m much better than I used to be , and I’m sure you will be too .. But I still have many issues ,that I don’t believe that they’re only from my anxiety or deppresion .. Like right now I’ve met a guy who heard all the story of my piggies and helped me a lot, not like my ex, but I feel like I’m scared to start going out with him and get to know him better ? It doesn’t make sense because I like him ..And it’s not the first time that this is happening to me .. I’m scared that I will hurt his feelings , but I can’t tell him the complete truth about me I don’t feel so comfortable.. I am getting ratty so many times with people ,especially when my piggies got sick , I was like a bomb that will explode! I’ve started blaming my sister for Ratis death , and then I started blaming everyone for everything that is going wrong ,not only for my piggies .. Yes you’ve really helped me a lot , i needed to talk with someone,but even if I have “friends” , no one could understand my pain , and they were trying to make me feel good by telling me that I’m dramatic and there is no reason to act like that because they’re old piggies! at least I’ve could talk to you that you understood what I’ve been through ,and you’ve been there too ..
. You are probably scared to get involved because of the situation with your ex maybe? You are probably scared to trust him and that he may turn out to be the same and not support you in the future? I don't know.... but if you do like him and he makes you happy then just see how things go, you have nothing to lose. As time goes by and if things go well between you, that's when you will feel comfortable telling him the truth about yourself and if he's worth it, he will understand and support you. If not then he obviously isn't worth it and there's plenty more fish in the sea!