"Dear Godfrey and Duncan,
I'm sure your human is wonderful but mines does whatever I ask.. Blueberries won't tempt me, as she told me she's buying fresh ones tomorrow. I'm sorry, but she's mine.
I used to have a boar in my life, Mikey. He was such a gentleman and the only piggy that has ever let me pretend to be boss! We only had 6 short months together as I didn't come to live with my current slave until I was 4 years old. He was my one true love, and I'm not looking for anyone else. Besides... I'm 7 years and 8 months old, where would a lady of such an age find time for a boar in between my modelling schedules, vet trips and weekend living room galavanting?
I am flattered... But it's a "no likely, no lightey" from me.
Yes, I also watch Take Me Out on a Saturday evening.
Fudge"
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