Diary Of Two Eligible Bachelors

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"Hello, humans! We're looking to trade slaves, please. Today's salad was meagre at best- no peppers, no radicchio, no parsley or coriander! The human said something about the peppers being a bit mouldy or something- honestly, terrible excuse. Instead we had something odd- dark green and light green, the light green bit was basically water. We were NOT impressed. We had a few nibbles, then dropped it, hoping the human had something tastier. We sniffed her fingers hopefully, but nope. She should do a little shopping trip, with three colours of pepper and some tasty treats!"
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"I expect Godfrey told you we have no peppers, no real food at all! Here's the human giving me a piece of hay. Hmmf. I'm a growing boar, I need peppers, herbs, fruit, loads of green things. The weird green thing she gave us was disappointing- how can water be solid and green? It tasted almost of nothing. We miss our crunchy pepper! The humans had Romano peppers, and we had some, but, if you could believe the utter selfishness- a human ate the rest of them! I'm not joking, I wish I was! It's appalling. With a bit of luck the humans will have a better salad for us soon. Otherwise, we'll have to order new slaves on the site the humans use- Amazon."
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The fleece! The guinea pig fleece is fantabulous!

So are the boys too of course :love:
 
"Hello humans! We have a new food. Mum says it's carrot and time. I don't know how you put time in a carrotty stick, but hey ho. Maybe she means thyme, the herby thing that tastes nice. Like the roof of those carrot cottages. Whatever it is, we like it! Even if Duncan hogs it because he's a chubby piggy."
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"Godfrey hogs the new treat! He's the chubby pig, not me! We like our new food. The human says it's a "treat" but it should be always available. You can't see it because I'm covering it, sorry! It's just so yummy...It looks like a carrot, but tastes like a carrotty herby crunchy treat. Plus we get to stre-e-e-tch up and get it!"
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"Om nom nom...hmm? Oh hi humans! We're still in love with our crunchy treat. Mum says we're having new types of hay tomorrow, for a treat! YAY! I love hay! Especially those crunchy, fluffy bits we sometimes get. I hope our new hay is just as nice! Do you know, it's very cold outside so we haven't been out in AGES! Mum still opens the window a bit to give us fresh air."
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"Munch munch munch..."
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"Godfrey? Were you eating that carrotty thing again? I told you to limit yourself. Oh, hello humans! Did Godfrey tell you about the hay? I thought all hay was the same. Well, a bit different. We like getting new treats and things, otherwise I get bored and chew the bars. We both had more cuddles than usual today, just because! This new fleece is fabulous, I like my ninja forest and tunnel. Godfrey never sees me coming..."
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"Munch munch...tastes like the carrot cottage roof..."
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"You can't see me, but I can see you...
Actually, I couldn't see Godfrey, he was in the cube earlier and I decided to toddle on top of the cube. I don't think he found it comfy. Talking of comfy, our new soft hay is in my little grassy nest. I can eat and snuggle! Yay! The human's mum gave us an extra snack. We like her, she thinks we need 'feeding up'. I didn't feeding made you grow up, but we don't mind; any excuse for food!"
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"We chatter teeth, and rumble, and chase...but in the end, we come together to eat. Also, excuse the odd grey thing, the human has some new mittens. No mitten is as cute as our paws though! Oh, and our new hay came! We have really soft hay that the human says is 'grass hay', and also hay that tastes like flowers. Apparently it's 'botanical hay'. I like all of it really, but only as long as we keep our tasty timothy hay!
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"The humans put our hay in this rack thing, who knows why. But we still get hay in our nest and snuggle sack, to curl up in. When it's here we can't poop on it. I wonder if that's the humans' plan..."
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Spot the piggy! Can you find him?
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"Mum likes seeing my ears from behind. They change colour from pale pink to dark pink! Not depending on my mood though, depending on temperature."
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"Hay is warm to snuggle in. And you can eat without moving! The humans don't like us pooping on it but we still do it...shh!"
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