Bonding Help - please!

I’m sorry it’s so tense! Fingers crossed it settles down eventually. Is there any chance you could find Bean a friend to live with alongside Reggie?
 
Siikibam said:
I’m sorry it’s so tense! Fingers crossed it settles down eventually. Is there any chance you could find Bean a friend to live with alongside Reggie?
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I dont think its going to work out. Reggie just has no idea how to act at all. My worry now is that this is my mothers house, and there is very little way she is going to allow me to have 3 pigs again, but I can not keep Reggie as a completely single pig... I just so wish they could get along.
 
The videos don't seem that bad to me, my dominant boar chased around his brother and did a lot of mounting and chasing and both did a lot of rumblestrutting when I first got them, and they were already a bonded pair and had lived together since birth, but a new location was enough to start that. It was a few days before they settled down. It's harder to tell without the sound, I turned the videos up to max volume and still couldn't hear them making any noises so I can't gauge the levels of stress. I've only had my pigs for a little over a year, though, so I wouldn't know as much as some of the other users.
 
I also am not one of the most experienced people. My boys have just had a chasing/rumbling looking on the verge of fighting days which has reminded me how much it tests your nerves. Watching videos doesn't get across the tension that is palpable to you.
 
Are you able to find Reggie a friend to live alongside, even if not in the same cage? I’m sorry.
 
piggl said:
I dont think its going to work out. Reggie just has no idea how to act at all. My worry now is that this is my mothers house, and there is very little way she is going to allow me to have 3 pigs again, but I can not keep Reggie as a completely single pig... I just so wish they could get along.
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If you are concerned Reggie doesn’t know how to act with a cagemate then having another piggy live as a neighbour is going to be the only viable option - it’s possible for a piggy to want interaction but to just never be prepared to share territory. You don’t need three piggies .

It’s hard to tell from what is essentially a quick snapshot of brief parts of interaction but things don’t look terrible on the videos. I’ve certainly seen a worse tension from my own boys - and I’m talking about Dexter and Popcorn in their younger years and they were well bonded and happily for 6 years! (Of course Wil and Hugo had a full fight at 18 weeks old so it was obviously game over for them and they’ve been side by side since).

If you wish to return bean then of course you can do that but you may still end up with a side by side situation with another piggy if Reggie genuinely can’t find a friend to live in.
 
Piggies&buns said:
If you are concerned Reggie doesn’t know how to act with a cagemate then having another piggy live as a neighbour is going to be the only viable option - it’s possible for a piggy to want interaction but to just never be prepared to share territory. You don’t need three piggies .

It’s hard to tell from what is essentially a quick snapshot of brief parts of interaction but things don’t look terrible on the videos. I’ve certainly seen a worse tension from my own boys - and I’m talking about Dexter and Popcorn in their younger years and they were well bonded and happily for 6 years! (Of course Wil and Hugo had a full fight at 18 weeks old so it was obviously game over for them and they’ve been side by side since).

If you wish to return bean then of course you can do that but you may still end up with a side by side situation with another piggy if Reggie genuinely can’t find a friend to live in.
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He is terrified of bean and I just don’t understand why. I let them stay together overnight as I knew if bean needed to get away he could go under hay and be left alone.

I’ve been watching them for about 15 minutes and he’s just so scared. Whenever bean moves or does anything near him, he freezes. And if he can’t freeze he rumble struts/nips and chases.

It’s really strange. Right now beans hiding under hay and eating, and Reggie is back to his normal self, but 2 seconds ago when bean was running about, he refused to move and as I mentioned started nipping or rumblestrutting.
 
piggl said:
He is terrified of bean and I just don’t understand why. I let them stay together overnight as I knew if bean needed to get away he could go under hay and be left alone.

I’ve been watching them for about 15 minutes and he’s just so scared. Whenever bean moves or does anything near him, he freezes. And if he can’t freeze he rumble struts/nips and chases.

It’s really strange. Right now beans hiding under hay and eating, and Reggie is back to his normal self, but 2 seconds ago when bean was running about, he refused to move and as I mentioned started nipping or rumblestrutting.
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It comes down to whether you’re prepared to see if they can sort things out or whether you need to call it a day.

Are you certain you aren’t projecting your fear of bond failure - which would be understandable given he has had failed bonds - onto what you are seeing when rather he isn’t frozen with fear and is instead just letting bean get on with it and then doing a manly bit of dominance?
 
In all honestly, I do not think their behaviour looks too bad but like I say, I’m not an expert with boars. It looks like Reggie is just asserting his dominance to me and putting Bean in his place? x
 
Piggies&buns said:
It comes down to whether you’re prepared to see if they can sort things out or whether you need to call it a day.

Are you certain you aren’t projecting your fear of bond failure - which would be understandable given he has had failed bonds - onto what you are seeing when rather he isn’t frozen with fear and is instead just letting bean get on with it and then doing a manly bit of dominance?
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You probably aren’t wrong, I struggle with anxiety on top of his previous failed bonds, but I still don’t understand why he has rumble strut and chase bean whenever he does anything at all.

Beans just looking for a friend and he instead has some big man that rumbles and chases him every time he sees him.
 
What looks terrible to us is normal to them. I've watched the videos now and my boys were doing worse the other day, hubby was convinced it was the end and wanted to separate them. It seemed really bad because some pigs are VERY dramatic, yes I'm looking at you Master Boris. I left them to get on with it and now they're closer than ever. If Bean isn't being hurt it should be fine.
 
fluffysal said:
What looks terrible to us is normal to them. I've watched the videos now and my boys were doing worse the other day, hubby was convinced it was the end and wanted to separate them. It seemed really bad because some pigs are VERY dramatic, yes I'm looking at you Master Boris. I left them to get on with it and now they're closer than ever. If Bean isn't being hurt it should be fine.
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Glad to hear Master Boris and Sir George made it past their grievances! I do need to give them a chance, it’s just so hard!
 
piggl said:
You probably aren’t wrong, I struggle with anxiety on top of his previous failed bonds, but I still don’t understand why he has rumble strut and chase bean whenever he does anything at all.

Beans just looking for a friend and he instead has some big man that rumbles and chases him every time he sees him.
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That’s boars! Wilbur and Hugo rumble at everything and everyone! As expected they’ve been worse since Dexter passed three weeks ago and I moved Popcorn down to be beside them as well.

The reality is, even in a well matched pair, it takes two weeks for things to fully be established.
 
Piggies&buns said:
That’s boars! Wilbur and Hugo rumble at everything and everyone! As expected they’ve been worse since Dexter passed three weeks ago I moved Popcorn down to be beside them as well.

The reality is, even in a well matched pair, it takes two weeks for things to fully be established.
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I’m so sorry to hear that Dexter has passed.

I'm going to give them a chance, they both deserve it x
 
The boy gang are similar here too. Hector 🌈& Hamish would go through rumble offs with the occasional hump-a-thon and then be happy friends again.
Both Billy 🌈& Wally living as neighbours to Hamish will display similar behaviour through the bars.
The visitors…. They have big rumble offs & head humping dominance then go straight back to happy hay munching. I find it tricky watching them, they definitely put me on edge at times- it’s can be hard to watch the normal to them behaviours.
As to us we wouldn’t accept that from a friend.

Edited to add: Wally rumbles at the fleece bag everyone he gets in it!

Hope your boys settle after a few days/2 weeks.
 
Things have been okay today, still with the rumble-strutting when Reggie sees Bean, but thankfully hes been doing it near him not on him. Sometimes there have been chases but they always end in popcorning from both pigs which is always a bit strange to see.

This dinner time Reggie was NOT happy with beans interest in what he was eating, but thankfully Bean took the hint and instead took veg from the pile. I make sure to cut up all veg small, as Reggie can finish his food 2x faster than bean. In the early days I often take baby out on their own to give them an extra piece the morning after, just in-case they didn't get much.

Thank you all for your advice and help, even throughout my panic. I have my fingers crossed that things will continue to be okay and baby bean does not lose his patience!
 
fluffysal said:
How are they doing today?
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Dare I say it, the boys are doing great!
Nipping is now very rare and Reggie’s scared chasing/rumble-strutting is much less prominent.

My only worry now is when Bean reaches his teenage years, but i’m HOPING that Reggie will feel much more secure in himself and their relationship by then, so any problems can be dealt with without a load of fear!

Meet Reggie and Bean!
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I have to thank you all again for your help with my panicked decision making. Without the lovely forums input bean would be away with someone else and I would be left in a not great predicament, a boar with an incorrect "unfriendly" title to his name. So, thanks again! 💕
 
piggl said:
They're doing amazing, thank you for asking. They're currently on their first official holiday together (boarding), and they're having a fantastic time!
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Sounds great, enjoy your holiday too. ⭐️
 
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