I failed at taking care of Timmie, she peacefully passed on april 19.

elecl

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Hi, thank you for taking the time to read my post.

In October 2019, we adopted 2 incredible guinea pigs. One of them was called Timmie and she was always so energetic, she was so so so adorable, always happy and very very excited for food.

Around april 11, I noticed that Tim's butt was very dirty. At that time, I was convinced that she was had just a little accident and was only dirty because of that. At that time, we didn't really noticed a change in behavior. Only after her death, we realised that she was eating less pellets and was hiding a bit more often than usually, but we didn't notice it at that time, only after her death. On april 15, Tim was still very dirty and the cage was really smelly. We haven't linked this with her being dirty. We also cleaned Tim that day and that's when I realized (way way way too late, I feel really really bad for noticing it that late) that she had diarrhea. We didn't see any soft stools in the cage, only around her butt. On April 15, her appetite didn't seem to be less than usual. On the 16, I really began worrying, I did some research but was really occupied with school. From what we remember, she was still walking normally and eating (but less than usually, we believe she was in fact not eating pellets and only ate a bit of vegetables). Things went downhill from April 17. She was eating way less, even refusing to eat lettuce. She was still eating some things like hay and a bit of parsley. We really thought that she was still eating, but after thinking about it, she might have been eating a lot less than we thought at that time. We also noticed that there was blood around her butt. On the 18, she was still eating, but very very very little. I started (wayy to late, i know) to force feed her on april 18 in the late afternoon. We were not equipped adequately, it was the first time we were dealing with a very sick guinea pig. The slury I made was very liquid since we didn't have the proper syringes. The morning of that day, she seemed able to walk normally, we began to saw that she had cloudy/crusty eyes. We called the vet, but they were fully booked until april 20. On april 18, in the evening, she was having a lot of difficulties to walk. I was so painful to see her and I was still hoping we could help her by force feeding her. She had not pooped a lot in the past days. On the 19, I took the day off to nurse her. I woke up, on the 19, to her having difficulties to breath, she passed few minutes after that.

I feel so so so much guilt. Our lack of knowledge and our very very late response was fatal for her. I knew guinea pigs were fragile, but I was not prepared for that drastic of a change. After her death, we really noticed her change in behavior (eating less pellets, hiding a lot, she was also not laying down as much maybe her belly was hurting). We really neglected her and that's what is killing me. A lot of sings were there, but we only noticed it when it was way way too late. It was a busy week for me and I prioritized other things, I don't think I will ever forgive myself. I am really wondering what got her to that stage. Only two weeks before, she seemed in perfect health. I really hope it was really her time to pass and that her death is not because of us. We did what we thought was right but we were so far off. She was about 5 (we didn't know exactly her birth date). At least, she can now rest peacefully. She was my ray of sunshine.

Thank you
 
So very sorry for your loss.
Guinea pigs are prey animals and very good at hiding illness.
What matters now is that you remember how much you loved and cared for her, you filled her life with love.
Guilt is a normal part of grieving, as is asking ‘what if…?’

Be gentle with yourself as you grieve.
Holding you in my heart.
 
I’m so sorry you lost Timmie. Please don’t feel guilty. They hide their illnesses so well. It sounds like you filled her whole life with love. That’s what counts. Try and remember all the happy times. She will be popcorning high over the bridge, pain free playing with all of our piggies. ❤️
 
Sorry for your loss. Just as others have said, piggies can hide illness really well and it can be in the very advanced stages that they show symptoms. Timmie knew they were loved. Sleep tight Timmie x
 
I’m so sorry you lost your little ray of sunshine, please don’t think it’s your fault. Guinea pigs are prey animals and they are geared up to hiding any illness until they are very ill. What matters is that you gave her a wonderful life filled with love and she will have known that, take care x

Popcorn high little Timmie 🌈
 
Thank you everyone for your kind words. After doing some research, I believe Timmie died from GI stasis. Is it possible that her system decided to shut down? She was 5 and seemed healthy until about week before her death. We will never know the real underlying cause of it. I just wish that I had realized what was happening to give even more love to my sweet little piggy. Popcorn high little Timmie and don't stop dreaming of lettuce🥬
 
Thank you everyone for your kind words. After doing some research, I believe Timmie died from GI stasis. Is it possible that her system decided to shut down? She was 5 and seemed healthy until about week before her death. We will never know the real underlying cause of it. I just wish that I had realized what was happening to give even more love to my sweet little piggy. Popcorn high little Timmie and don't stop dreaming of lettuce🥬

Hi

BIG HUGS

Piggies at that age or older can go downhill very quickly out of the blue. Severe bloating, a twisted gut or GI stasis can hit at any time, whether it is on their own or whether something underlying is triggering it. So can bloating or a fluid build-up in the body cavity that looks like bloating and that is associated with sudden heart failure. Any of these issues can be potentially fatal even when you are able to see a vet straight away. :(
Guinea pigs are wired to suppress symptoms to quite an astonishing degree but sometime there is simply nothing to overlook because nothing is there.

I have lost my own Llelo in February when he suddenly went downhill without any obvious symptoms; he was 5 years old and obviously one of his - likely smaller - organs gave way since started to fight the syringe very quickly after initially accepting my support feed if that is any consolation to you. Of course it had to happen over the weekend so the earliest appointment I could get was to put him to sleep since the natural dying process was not as smooth as I would have liked but he was also clearly beyond any chance of recovery. :(

Even with the best of care, you can only ever get your piggies so far unless there is a major health issue. What is always out of your control is when, what from and under what circumstances they die from (re. emergency vet access etc. which is very difficult to manage in Canada anyway) - that we can never choose and have to always deal with as best as we can under the circumstances. But please realise that guinea pigs don't have a concept for an average life span. They measure their lives in good daily care and happy todays. As long as you have given Tim those, you have not failed him in any way because you have given him what he wanted out of his life.

Please also accept that has humans we tend to reflect everything back onto ourselves. Feelings of guilt and failure are normal for the onset of the grieving process - we all have them because they are not a sign of failure but instead of how deeply we care. But they are also usually much more pronounced after an unexpected and traumatic end. Being left without knowing what exactly happened also adds to the burden.

Please be kind with yourself in the coming days. You may want to take the time to read these links here; you may find them helpful since they are all sensitive but at the same time very practical. They will hopefully answer some of your questions; including answers to the strange places the grieving process can take you and help you getting out of any pernicious loops you can get trapped in.
Death, Dying, Terminal Illness; Human Grieving and Bereaved Companions: Information and Support for Owners and Their Children
Digestive Disorders: Not Eating - Diarrhea - Bloat - GI Stasis (No Gut Movement)

PS: Timmie was a beatiful piggy! she will always have a nest in your heart and your precious memories and - as she has been part of your life - will always be a part of who you are.
 
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